dinner parties

what's so great about a dinner party?
to quote a friend, "EVERYTHING!"

catching up on your friends lives
no agenda
food is healthier when prepared with love (and from scratch)
you linger at the table, and enjoy the food and the experience more
you can create a diverse guest list (6 is a good number) - do it lots and mix up all your friends!
it's slow and relaxing
making a meal becomes fun again (invite one or some or all to come early and help you prepare)
good conversation
awakens awareness of manners and etiquitte
fun culture

watch, next we'll all start corresponding through letter writing... (i don't think that would be a bad thing! when was the last time you got a real letter?)

let's slow the world down

take the dinner party challenge! all it takes is your favorite recipe or two, your best dishes on the table and a few phone calls. you can do it!

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this week's menu:

appetizers
cheese stuffed mushrooms (blue cheese is nice and mild in these, yet exotic)
french bread with oil and vinegar

main (all homemade except for the pasta which came from the little italian shop)
fun mini lasagna noodles
marinara sauce
garlic toast
ceasar salad

beverage
white grape and pear juice - looks good in my wine flutes

dessert
specialty coffees with whipped cream and flavor sprinkles

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Last week's menu:
French onion soup for starters
Roast beef in the crock pot, roasted potatoes, gravy, vegetables in cheese sauce
Grandma's butterscotch drop recipe for dessert

grief

I’ve learned that grief is not a straight line. It sort of cycles, and while it will never be as bad as that first week, things do get better then they get worse again. I think the spirals do eventually get fewer and far between. I’ve learned that the days preceding an anniversary are worse than the actual day. I will get restless (read cranky or irritable or miserable or sad or down) and then realize that, oh, it’s because next week is his birthday or our anniversary (would have been 10 this year – that was a yucky one) or whatever it happens to be, and then it gets a little better because I give myself the ok to wallow in it for a while, then I feel like God says ok, now let’s get on with it and He pulls me out. And then sunshine. Till the next time round.

I miss him in so many ways.

me, me, me

Just a thought on the flip side. Lucado's got a book out entitled "It's Not About Me" or something like that. I haven't read it; maybe one day. I'm sure it will be a good read. The things I've been hearing lately have given me the opposite response, athough in a good way. It comes down to what I do with what I've heard. The gospel is central, don't get me wrong, and we are going to work to make that central in all we do, but what does it mean for me? What do I do with it? How do I respond?

It's not good enough to hear Joyce Heron proclaim that Christ's heart is for the poor and oppressed and the marginalized - I have to figure out what I need to do to put my heart in that place. How will I be a friend to the poor? And then I need to make that call.

It's not enough to hear about a fantastic method of discipleship - I need to figure if what I do or how I do it needs to change in light of that new information. And then I need to do it.

It's not enough to think that there are problems with something - I need to figure out what, if any, my part is in the solution. And then I need to do it.

I can only do what I can do, and I can do anything through Him who gives me the creativity, strength, and courage to do it. It comes down to the fact that I need to act in light of who I am in Him. What can I do? Big things that require big dreams. Little things that might mean the world to one person. The key is to DO.

the beautiful time

This just may be my favorite time of day. There is something magical about being up alone in a house that's quietly humming - there's never no noise, but it's as silent as it gets. The phone's not ringing, the stuff that has to get done is past being thought of, and my body is strangely heavy and alert at the same time. Maybe it's like fasting - as the physical body is deprived of what it needs, the mind becomes sharper.

Just a quick reflection, and now I'm off to bed, because as much as I do take great joy in this sensation, I know I will not be quite as content tomorrow when I'm trying to be patient. But for right now, it's worth it.

going low tech

So I am trying to simplify life, go lower tech, use my computer less, and here I am, starting a blog. Slightly ironic. It might have something to do with procrastination, although I am intentionally choosing to do something for myself tonight and finish working on the talk tomorrow, since I did work on it most of today. I think I need to actually decide that and live with it, instead of deciding as a way to try and justify not working on it, which ends up with me feeling like I wasted my night and feeling guilty.

So here's a question - where's the balance between public and private, blog wise? I guess you just need to decide who you're writing for; is that it? Because I journal, often, and that is between me and God - from me to God, mostly. It's a way to get my thoughts sorted, by getting them out onto paper - puts things in perspective for me. Why do I need a blog then? I guess this is for you, the reader who is out there anomyously. To get my thoughts and questions out into the realm where they might cause others to think.

Some themes in my life recently...

emergent. I'm reading more and the more I read on it, the more it makes sense of how I've been thinking and doing things. Things make more sense - isn't that weird how others can explain what's in your head even though you didn't know it was really a question? I'm enjoying being stretched that way.

mentoring. What to do when you are asked to be a mentor... an ongoing theme that sits on the back burner and gets brought to the front every once in a while.

relationships. How to love people and commit to them when you don't like to pick up the phone.

There's more, but that might be enough for now. A different focus than a journal for sure. I think I like.